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St. Louis Post-Dispatch

Lee Enterprises

Sunday, January 25, 2009 9:02 PM CST
At expo, future brides still willing to splurge on their weddings

By NATHANIEL WEST, Staff Writer
nwest@jg-tc.com

MATTOON — When she gets married Sept. 5, Whitney Anderson of Arcola will have the financial support of her parents.

“We’re going to try to limit our budget to what they can give me,” said Anderson.

And her parents are willing to give quite a bit.

“Honestly, when it comes to my kids, it doesn’t matter; we make it happen,” said Lori Anderson while perusing the exhibits at the Cross County Mall’s bridal expo Sunday.

It remains to be seen whether the wedding industry is “recession-proof.” But even as the economy continues to sputter, brides-to-be and their parents at Sunday’s expo said that, while they are trying to rein in spending somewhat, they are still willing to splurge a little for that special day.

Lori Anderson said they have already exceeded their spending plan for her daughter’s wedding, but she doesn’t mind because, “It’s a once-in-a-lifetime thing.”

Jenna Billiter of Bloomington will marry Lance Montgomery of Mattoon in Windsor on Nov. 7, and the couple is having to pay for most of the wedding. Billiter said she has a “pretty steady job,” and “there are certain things we’re going to splurge on.”

However, she hopes to save money by hiring a family friend to serve as photographer and an uncle, who is a florist, to provide flowers. The couple also will travel to a domestic destination for their honeymoon.

“If we didn’t have those family connections, we’d really have to budget,” Billiter said.

Shelly Wolf of Charleston is helping to pay for the Oct. 10 wedding of her daughter, Ashly, by putting in extra hours at work.

“I can’t say as we’ve said, ‘We can’t afford that,’” said Wolf. “It’s a one-time thing. We’re going to find a way to come up with the money.”

Heather Wallace’s parents also are paying for her June 27 wedding in Trilla. “I know the economy is affecting them,” said Wallace, of Trilla.

But so far, aside from having a “guilty” conscience, Wallace said she has not had to make any major sacrifices because of the economy.

And she is trying to keep costs low by forgoing a caterer and separate reception hall, in addition to doing all of her own decorating. A family friend is making the cake.

Cydney Shook of Gays and her fiance, Austin Frank, a graduate student at Eastern Illinois University, are trying to save money by enlisting friends to do their wedding photography and videography.

Shook said her mother is paying for the wedding, so, “I’m just trying to be more money-conscious.”

At the same time, her mother has yet to say “no” to any proposed expenses, aside from hiring a professional photographer, she added.

The economy “hasn’t changed anything, but it’s definitely been on my mind,” Shook said.

Toni Arthur of Mattoon just got engaged and is in the early stages of planning her June 12, 2010, wedding. This head start should help to “get the best prices,” she said.

But Arthur attributes any limitations on spending to the fact that she is a college student, not because of the economy. She said she is willing to splurge “a little bit,” although “I am not an extravagant person anyways.”

Contact Nathaniel West at nwest@jg-tc.com or 238-6860.

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das wrote on Jan 26, 2009 9:59 AM:

" Statistically, more than half of the girls mentioned in this article will get a divorce. Maybe you should hold onto some of the money parents, they'll need it to fight a divorce battle. "

gringa wrote on Jan 26, 2009 10:34 AM:

" I was in the mall yesterday and saw the folks hawking all the usual wedding products and services: limosines, carriages, DJs, photographers, caterers, clothing, cakes, etc.

Sadly, there were no clergy there and there were no financial planners there. Perhaps the absence of premarital counseling from clergy and financial planners accounts for such a high divorce rate.

If I were a parent in the wedding planning mode, before spending a dime for a gala affair, I would insist on premarital consults from clergy and a competent financial advisor for my in-love wide-eyed darlings. "

pj1983 wrote on Jan 26, 2009 7:18 PM:

" you don't need a financial planner when you're spending mommy and daddy's money. and i'm not sure i'd want to go with a minister who was out trolling for business at the mall :)

i agree with das however and i laughed everytime on sunday that i heard a vendor say "you only get married once" "

ANolte wrote on Jan 26, 2009 10:06 PM:

" I completely agree with the previous comments. However, I did want to mention that Father Dennis of The Immaculate Conception Church had my fiancee and I meet with him to discuss marital issues that we might experience.

He was wonderful in providing advice and ways to communicate with each other. Also, the church set us up for a premarital service at the Newman Center in Charleston.

I can honestly say that I'm very grateful that I have been guided to discuss communication and financial issues.

We'll find out if it pays off! ;) "

The Question wrote on Jan 27, 2009 6:28 AM:

" The monumental selfishness of the Bridezillas is a continual source of rueful humor. Someone should remind them that the whole point is the marriage, NOT the wedding.
Paddy Chayefsky wrote eloquently about all this back in the 1950s, in "A Catered Affair." "

Becky wrote on Jan 27, 2009 8:10 AM:

" Where is it written that weddings have to be on a grand scale? It's easier on everyone involved to keep the wedding within a budget that doesn't strain anyone. Then the newly weds can use anything left over for a honeymoon, down payment on a home, savings account or new things for the new home. The fancy dinners, bands, birds, flowers don't make a happy marriage. Just a needlessly expensive wedding. "

gringa wrote on Jan 27, 2009 8:48 AM:

" pj, I agree, the "you only get married once" line is almost impossible to say with a straight face. It would be even more difficult to hear those words without cracking up.

Sadly, some of our unwed mothers and fathers say "If you want to maximize your welfare benefits, you should not get married at all." Maybe next week the mall should have a Non-bridal expo that features speakers from the Department of Human Services and Planned Parenthood. Come to think of it, maybe they should have had a gun dealer there selling shotguns. LOL.

But, pj, when you besmirch the idea of ministers out trolling for business, remember that Jesus made an appearance at that infamous mall a few thousand years ago. He certainly got the attention of a few of the attendees that day. If you want to influence unwitting behavior, you have to go where the action is. "

pj1983 wrote on Jan 27, 2009 7:17 PM:

" you have a lovely point gringa, but those couples weren't looking for a church to worship in, they were looking for a place to have a party. i find the idea of ministers at the mall saying "5 minute ceremonies right here...i was ordained online..." laughable.

i agree that money isn't everything. my husband and i got married two years ago and spent less than $3000 on the whole thing (when i say WE spent, i of course meant that my PARENTS spent :D)
i know girls who are spending more on their dresses than what we spent to clothe the entire bridal party. and you know what? my husband and i are just as married after spending $3000 than those couples will be after spending $20,000 "

medic57 wrote on Jan 27, 2009 11:28 PM:

" you don't need a financial planner when you're spending mommy and daddy's money

No, but you sure do after the Honeymoon when you're spending your own.

Where is it written that weddings have to be on a grand scale?

I believe they were talking about money there. "

Full Boat wrote on Jan 28, 2009 7:31 PM:

" Young couples just starting out certainly should not saddle themselves with a huge amount of debt from their wedding but there is something to be said about weddings being a celebration. If that is the focus of a couple, to really celebrate their life together, then I think its all right to maybe spend some money. I have been to some very nice weddings where the couple clearly wanted guests to celebrate with them. They spent money on good food and a good DJ in particular. I also think its all right to pay a lot for good professional photos but I have also seen some awful photos that still cost a lot. "

STINKY wrote on Jan 28, 2009 9:35 PM:

" I always says "you only get married once". Therefore, I say spend like crazy. "