Tuesday, December 30, 2008 9:50 PM CST
COLUMN: As this new year begins, don't forget to ... um, well, you know
By PENNY WEAVER, Night News Editor
pweaver@jg-tc.com
I’ve come up with my No. 1 resolution for the new year, and here it is:
... um ... here it is: uhhhh ...
Oh yeah, right! It’s to improve my memory.
How could I forget?
I’ve often thought of joining a support group for people like me who frequently have trouble remembering things, but I’d probably forget when the meetings were. I guess most of the members would — if any of us remembered to sign up in the first place.
Everyone jokes about getting older and more forgetful. I think some of my shaky memory is related to my moods, but either way, it doesn’t seem to get better as I age.
As with any handicap, we all just have to find ways to cope.
The first thing I try to do is write things down. I make lists of groceries, tasks to do, even little tidbits to tell my mom the next time I talk to her on the phone.
Then I can’t find my lists.
I suspect I may have a long list of where I put these lists before I even turn 40 — and short of duct-taping it to my forehead, I probably won’t be able to remember where that list is, either.
I put things away in a “safe place,” and let me tell you, I do a great job, too — they end up in a place so safe that even I can’t find them. Then I’ll run across that item a day or a week later, and mentally slap my hand to my forehead: “Oh, that’s where I put that!”
My solution for that one is to try to put everything in “plain sight,” or at least so it’s visible when I open a cabinet or a drawer. I’m going on the old saying of “out of sight, out of mind,” and sometimes it actually works.
One of the most annoying parts of having a faltering memory is forgetting people’s names. I can see someone I’ve known for years and suddenly they could be named Elvis, and wearing bell-bottomed sequin pants and a short cape, and I’d never think of their name.
Sometimes I’ll run into someone at the grocery store or while shopping for ... um, shopping for ... um, yeah, whatever’s on my list, and I know that I know them. They say, “Hi Penny!” so enthusiastically that I of course return the happy greeting, all the while racking my brain to come up with their name.
I can always recognize a face. It’s making the connection between the name and the face that I have trouble with.
I hope no one takes this personally. It’s not that the people I know aren’t memorable. It’s all me, truly.
Usually I’ll say, “Oh my gosh, I know your face but I can’t think of your name for the life of me!” and just ’fess up.
But there are tricks to avoid having to admit that your brain has bumped into the “pause” button.
I try this: “How are you?” and get the person to talk about themselves. That can trigger more information. The little elves in my cranium start flipping furiously through pages and pages of information, referencing and cross-referencing to solve this complex mystery.
Then sometimes I’ll fall back on my journalistic mindset. “Oh, everyone should wear name tags!” I’ll exclaim, rolling my eyes to mock myself and explaining that when I regularly did photography for newspapers I wished that people wore name tags. “Plus, then I could always remember both names and faces!” I’ll add.
“How is everyone in your family?” is another noble attempt. I’ve heard other people say that they ask that, hoping for a light bulb to blink on when certain loved ones’ names come up.
Tell me you haven’t done this. Uh huh — thought so.
I think most people have had these moments, so they sympathize and don’t give me a hard time about it. I still find it embarrassing, though, when I ask Mom how everyone in her family is, and she has to tell me that I’m a member of her family ...
Okay — I’m exaggerating. I’m not that bad just yet.
It seems like I can’t remember — ha, ha — an age when I didn’t do this one: walk into a room and forget what I walked into that room for.
I blame that on the bane that is multitasking. I’m thinking of one thing I need to do, and headed to one part of the house to do that, and I suddenly see something else that reminds me of another thing I need to do, and my brain just can’t handle a pair of tasks colliding like that.
I give those cranium elves a workout, let me tell you.
One of the best ways I’ve found to deal with my intermittent memory is another old adage: “A place for everything, and everything in its place.” I keep certain things in certain spots around the house, and I put them back there after I use them.
Sure, some call that anal retentive. Some call it obsessive compulsive. I call it “organized.”
That’s what keeps me sane, or as close as I can get. We all have our little quirks, so we just have to understand our own weaknesses — um, I mean, challenges — and do the best we can with what we’ve got.
So if you see me in the grocery store, and I don’t know you because we’ve never met before, please try to refrain from having a little fun with me by acting like we’re old friends. I know it’d be easy, but believe me, I’ve got enough mental handicaps to juggle.
Then again, by the time the new year is here, I’ll probably have forgotten what I wrote in this column, so I guess I’m fair game.
I think I’ll spend New Year’s trying to figure out why I can remember the words to songs I haven’t heard for 20 years but I can’t remember what is on the grocery list that I made this morning and left in the car an hour later as I went into the store.
At least, I think that was today.
Add your comments
Not already registered?
Then click Here.
Comment policy:
JG-TC.com encourages readers to engage in civil conversation with their neighbors. Comments that are submitted are not posted to the site immediately. They go into a queue to be moderated and may take several hours to be reviewed. Comments posted on Saturday may not be reviewed until Sunday afternoon.
In order to keep the page a set width, long lines (mostly long links) will be chopped. Try putting spaces in your links or consider using tinyurl.com to make a smaller link that you can include.
We will never edit or alter your comments, but we do reserve the right to remove comments that violate our code of conduct.
No comment may contain:
* Potentially libelous statements; such as accusing somebody of a crime, defamation of character, or statements that can harm somebody's reputation.
* Obscene, explicit, or racist language.
* Personal attacks, insults, threats, harassment or inciting violence.
* Commercial product promotions.
If you have any questions, please contact our moderator.
|
|
|
gringa wrote on Dec 30, 2008 11:01 PM: